Why not simply live in the present? & the sandwich theory.

From the present day to the ad infinitum, the weather has blessed us with rains, sunlight, snow and autumn. Even when we were not there, so archaic that the existence itself was insignificant, the time where even the apes were not our ancestors then the time was sunrise and sunset, the only light to help the eyesight of the living, was the sunlight. The day came and passed away as they do now. We came into existence and to put in today’s language “the human race progressed” I would say more or less only technologically, cause as we are progressing we are becoming physically weak, even the jaw these days cannot accommodate the 32 teeth’s and the so called last entrants to the tooth family “the wisdom tooth” are unwashed extracted from the jaw as they cannot accommodate. Still we are progressing.

We started growing intellectually as well. The progress is an on-going process, how about having a flash back over it? That has changed recently but not long ago. The open ownerless grounds just around the lane of the house, is difficult to find. Games have changed from climbing trees, playing hide and seek to Play stations and idiot box. Rains were when kids used to run out of the glimpse from their mothers, only to get sloshed by the water, make paper boats and race their boats in the stream, get all muddy only to return home with wet hair and bemire clothes. Today the rains make kids to stay back at home as the fear cough and cold. School was the time to study and rest was childhood. Today the school is the time for studies and rest is the time for tuitions. Playing outdoor games was a mundane activity of the day, which has changed to extra circular activity today. Life was to have a nice job and all set for life. Today it starts with jumps for better packages and ends in endless working hours. Knowing what is happening in one’s life is distant story, the only story is academics when a child and paying jobs when older. This something we call past.

Now the next thing is the future. This trend is to be followed so that you have a lavishing career. The age for schooling used to start from 5 onwards which has shrunk to 2 years. The weight of the child carrying a school bag is comparable to the weight of the bag itself. Stress was not something heard of before, but now even kids have stress levels. What would happen tomorrow, is the only tape running in the head today. Slowly realized, but steadily forgotten is today, only for a better tomorrow. Let’s try to summarize and understand with the help of the sandwich theory.
The sandwich theory.
Lets consider you are having a sandwich, which is a potato sandwich, so what do we have now, two slices of bread, in between stuffed are the potato’s. let’s consider the first slice as yesterday(the past), the second slice as tomorrow(the future) and the potato’s today(the present). Now you would not like to eat the first slice of bread(past), only as it would not taste of what you expect the sandwich to taste like. Similar would be the case for the second slice of bread. It could taste like a sandwich with some potato’s inside(today), but then the quality of the potato’s and the ingredients added would only make the difference and could give the taste buds the pleasure of the sandwich. What does that mean? Think about it again, the past has gone and unchanged it would remain to your last breath unconquered, unchanged, future is yet to come and would only be known when you live now. All your options are left with today. Today is that would make difference to your tomorrow, today would only make a day to be remembered in the past. The amazing problem is that we are so sacred to live today.

Let me help you with the theory with an example: two friends meet, one of the friend has to depart for few months to some other city, thinking about all the good times in the past they had together, name the friends as x and y. x has to depart, x asks y are we going to have the same fun, all the things we do again, after I come back?(second slice, future) and could not enjoy the time together with y(potato, today). What would happen? Think about it. the potato was not cooked, as they did not have a good time together(it cannot be used to make the sandwich) also there was no part that could have added to memories of the past, cause today went to waste. The taste buds nor the stomach would ask for it.

Let’s try to understand some more. It is living in the present that can give a good sandwich, whose ingredients are good slice of fresh bread and good potato’s, how will we get fresh bread? The memories that are good are generally remembered, isn’t ? do you try to remember the bad one’s I guess nobody wants to. The first slice is ready, the good you do today would only bring a good tomorrow, an enemy created today would not bring peace tomorrow, laziness today would not bring prosperity tomorrow, doing wrong to others would not bring you right tomorrow. That is how the second slice of the bread can be made. For potato’s you have to live today, to the fullest, put in your best, fear not the future nor the results. Strive for excellence, leave today with a better day than that you found in the morning. Compete with yourself and your yesterday and not with others. The sandwich is all yours to satisfy your body and soul.

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Anathema taking over men and women….

We say life is all complex these days, Relations are sour, infidelity is to its peak, trust and love are factors more or less in love stories, togetherness is staying in the bed, work and pleasure are mixed for benefits of oneself, manipulation is the "in" thing and we say life is all complex.

Impunity for doing wrong to others is these days, like a birth right. The circumstances have become the deciding factors for relationships, not the urge to be together. It is not about having a good time together, it is more about what would one get after this time together. How things have changed. Friends for convenience is as common to hear as difficult to find common sense these days. They say they progressing, they are westernized, they are modern, albeit the poorest people at heart. Conscious is losing its ground guilt and shame are not even present for lip service in ones soul, cause all they thinks is to grow.

Pious is only for show, now even that is old. They talk of spirituality and lack the spirit in oneself. They talk of being one, but with whom is the quest? They talk they are growing just fine, back down leaving a trail of broken spine. Relations are more or less give and take, you give and I take. What has changed? Why the ego of growth has the taken over conscious of the mind, don’t they have ethic’s or have turned to boneless spines? A man may not be judged by his deeds but the bank balance in the account. A woman is all interested in the canal and the crown. Is it progress? I doubt I believe it depriving the human race to act as humans. The crowd is where people move cause oh! is it called being modern oh! it must be just so cool. What is this happiness are just not trying to be super cool? What has happened to the so called man.

At times I think it was better when it was old, at least there were trees that we called tall and old. The shadow of the trees in scorching is still better than the shadow of the cement junk. There was a time when the words meant commitment, a promise, one would keep till the end, now we turn back only find it was the end. I wished the old times would return. Bruised knees are better than broken hearts, once a week a t.v. serial is better than the daily soap bizarre. If losing oneself, losing ethics, losing reliability and losing one’s conscious is called growth I respect the people who are now old.

Tell me isn’t it a curse, how we were expected to live and when we live in so much of dirt? I still don’t think this is the best thing that we grew up to see on earth. I wish to become a man of commitment, a path to follow may dirge music will follow, but I would look in the mirror everyday and look straight into the eye just find my conscious still alive. I recall the lines said so beautifully, “god grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.” I cannot change the world but I can change myself, I want to be honest to myself, may these guiding crowds may not misguide my soul as there is conscious deep down which I still hold.

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Funny things happen when in a state called love.

Expectations are unlimited but reciprocation is very limited, ideal love life has hundreds of thoughts, suggestions, assumptions, possibilities, desires and the list goes on and on, but nobody is ready to perform the duties for the same or even put in the effort, cause ideal is this, this how it has to happen. My dear friend even the leaves don’t move by itself it needs the winds to let it flow in the air. It is very easy for us to brag about the ideal relation has to be like this, a very few understand if taken care, nurtured, loved unconditionally would only make the love bloom to glory.

Amazing people with amazing doubts, the world is so rational so logical, I thought I would bring to notice that if love is by rationality, I may suggest a few reasons to check the rationality of a relation. A friend of mine was determined that he would only go in for a love marriage, cause until you know the person how can you spend your whole life(very clear, agree). I asked a simple question how many times do you meet your girlfriend in a week, curt reply everyday I said fair enough, let’s consider an hour a day, he said yes, now if I have to meet a single person for an hour a day out of hourly clock that has 24, won’t I be the best of what I want to project. The most happening, always with something new, flowery stuff, chocolate stuff, today this is our first stuff, cool about everything, would you be doing it after a year, let’s assume yes cause still the amount of time that you are spending together is just an hour and still you come up with something new. I have a question now do you really know the person, a question may not be answered to me, but ask yourself.

Let’s move ahead in time a bit more, you and your dream girl get married, suddenly things that were perfect and you ignored have started annoying you, like really petty things which you ignored before, but not it is getting on your nerves, getting up late it is was perfect before when you a bachelors, but now as you are married you want your things to be straightened up as it was before, you ignore a few days get yourself to work and manage things around. Then the taste of the food is nowhere close to good what you used to have before, forget about getting the lunch pack for the office, again you ignore. Evenings you used to roam about not matter how tiring the day was, now you try to sit back at home, obviously your girlfriend turned wife is having a problem with that, when you say I am tired. Ignore and move on. Then one fine day you remember they were so many cool things we used to do before everything was so special why not now. The answer is you know very well, you pretended to be somebody you are not.

Never pretend something that you are not in a relationship, specially the one relation you want to last an eternity and be as fresh as the bloomed boutique. Cause you cannot pretend for life and these small things after a year of ignorance suddenly come to surface and hit like a lighting, that day you are just struck you immediate reaction and to protect there is a mechanism, self defense, you give back what all you have ignored all the while. Boom there is fight, then you lie, then the chorus songs are played. What is the point, wouldn’t it have been better if you could have been what exactly you are. There is a lot of things that could be avoided by just staying together with each other for some time either before marriage or giving each other not the projected but the real figure that you are.

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India is my country…….is it?

A feeling of trepidation vicarious, but it is there right there in the back of my mind, first it was innocent people who were killed now not even the officials are left to be alive, massacre killings of police officials, then innocent people and then the train, I ask god is there going to be an end. How merciless one could be to knife into the eye of people to check if they are dead gross.

The virtuoso government of our nation still is retroactive as in the past, once the sacrosanct of the government(parliament) was attached and the boorish sadist is still kept alive to see us die one by one, why is that the common does not have the right to live as a human and not to be treated as insipid waste? Lord shall bless us all, but I still don’t want to go high above to get the blessings directly from him.(I am serious no doubts about it).

The indigent hedonist human looks forward for a life, for happiness, security that I am alive and walk down the road and still be alive. Yes I believe I will but not cause I can change the rulers of the land, but I trust to the higher above, not that it can change anything but it helps me to accept that I can live with it.

One thing is for sure now, it is not the rulers of the land who want to or are willing to help us, we need to stand by ourselves for our own betterment. I heard a conversation saying the developed nations are 200 to 300 years old and they too have gone through all this, so what we see now is not different than what they have faced before. I believe I may be wrong but just because others took their sweet time to ripen do I need to wait to grow ripe. I don’t think so, if that would have been the case we would not have progressed and the renaissance would not have taken place.

Let’s not get into the lip service as before, let’s unite for good and stand for it and make it happen. I don’t know how it will work, but I do know, it will if we want to and not to only rely on tribulate rulers of the country. Let’s make this happen and let it happen now like no tomorrow can be a better tomorrow.

Acrimonious positivity…..

Thank you for your mails, comments, suggestions and appreciation, I had complains or suggestions or whatever you call it, that I generally do not write something positive. I guess I do, but the bitter part of being positive. I propose to do it again with a slight change, it is positive from a different prospective. Aesthetic allure of human to be positive, their altruistic behavior to share positivity with the abstruse negativity within, allow me to put it across this way. We read newspapers likely the first “to do things” in the morning, what does it say “so many people killed”, “adulterous activities”, “robbery”, “cozenage” this is how we start off. We seek to be positive, how is that? It has not happened in our neighborhood. Rush to the office the first greeting are “Did you read that news so sad” the person to start off also has his final word “we should be more careful, who can stop such an act, the government is responsible for this, etc. etc. etc.”

The sacrilegious sayings are said by the people trying to be sacrosanct, one of the many ironies of life, people subjugate in a life span. The interesting part is how does it affect without the clue, that it is affecting, it is so deep within us hidden in the darkest caves. I recall a movie starring Shah Rukh Khan, Priety Zinta called “Dil se…” out of mere curiosity I had asked people as to why didn’t like the movie, there obviously some astonishing comments, but maximum could gist out on because “the hero dies in the end” that is the whole point. They loved the dance sequence in the movie on the running train first in it’s own way, star caste, stuff people could just talk about but did not like it cause the hero dies.

This is just one of the examples, there are numerous other, may be movies, people, like for everything there is a whim, that it has to end in a positive whim only. Is there something wrong about it, no not at all, well we should all think to be positive, but the lip service people do is stranger than the fiction. Ok so what is the whole point about all this? To be positivist is not only to behave cocksure and brag about being positive. You don’t only need to say it, but to believe it. Don’t prove to the world, prove it to yourself.

Fear death, but living life right now to the fullest is being positive, others do and have done wrong to you, forgive them, remember don’t forget, forgiving them and moving ahead is being positive. People try to snatch your position, possessions, belongings. Trying to cling on them, trying to save them, getting in secured about everything is not even close to being positive, but aiming that I would have more than what people can take away from me is being positive. Thrown stones in water, spoken words and life lived cannot turn back, don’t try it, it is not how the nature is, it is not in your power. What you have is living right now to best of ability to live.

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Fighting rationality to the world is killing me inside.

Do I really need to prove anything to anyone is the question suddenly struck to my mind, sending shivers down my spine, forcing me to think am I here to be a missionary or a message. My conscious was shocked, what I could only reveal to myself, I am here to be a message and not a missionary.

Though it may seem illogical, I tried to my best to make up things, the best to my ability, turning the world as much as I could. In return I expected at least good wishes or nothing but not what I got. My intentions were questioned, I was made casteless I was degraded to speak my heart over rationality, I tried to fight rationality and I fought, but suddenly head increased in numbers than hearts, I could not beat the rationality, I lost it, named myself in bad books. Now was it essential to explain the occult to the most rational souls, who could not even appreciate the birds singing in morning, but think it is their role to play as bird on earth.

No, it was not worth it. I realized it late, I do agree, but honestly it is not worth it, ever to talk about it. Let me put it this way cause I am right so you are supposed to be wrong, this where the logic works, the rationality takes place, the other slope could be I am right that does not make you wrong, you can be right as well, for example: five hundred years back earth was flat, anybody who challenged it was taking to task, or even executed if determined to prove the same, now we all know the earth is round this is the reality today and anybody who says it is flat could be said to stop hallucinating.

Now the question is am I suppose to fight rationality cause it is not the truth now? I am also not making a statement that it is only me who knows the truth. Truth is universal and will come to conscious no matter what happens, even if it has to take some time. If I have understood it, then why am I trying to impose it to others, they have warranted up themselves with whatever mirage they are comfortable with, who am I to say break the cocoon and fly to glory? Answers coined up for my pieces of broken heart, rationality is what I had to bring to logically satisfy this world. No matter how much I tried to maintain a balance between being a rational and being an irradiate. I could not stop from taking sides, where as the world is not good and bad it is just the way it is, why am I taking sides?

Suddenly some beautiful lines came in front my eyes, “Always see good in everyone, be blind to the faults of others, it brings peace in your life. Things don’t change so just change the way you look at them” rationality took afire. What if other faults are hurting me? The reason for being hurt is that I had been trying to add everybody to make my world, but on contrary only one person can survive to become my whole world or I could become the my whole world for myself. Now can others rationality hurt, no I feel as peace, why am I seeking outside, when my heart lies within. I wished I knew it before, would not have hurt myself, but the sun would shine bright only after the darkest nights and not on cloudy days.

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A tryst with myself

An unforgettable journey I longed for. A saying I do remember every time there is something new “The need is the mother of all inventions”. So came up the need to go for a tryst with myself. Different feelings and different emotions erupt everyday, I believe all for the good, but our human nature makes it possible to divide it into good and bad, positive and negative, wanted and unwanted. How did this need came in? there are a number of reasons I am sure you would be able to relate at least to one. A feeling of despair, nobody else can understand me and I turned to you, you brought me down to my core, so called materialistic unsuccess, a path I walked where nobody and nothing could comfort for reasons I don’t know why and list to seek happiness outside goes on and on and on until we realize happiness is not outside, but a feeling within me. The irony is, if you can feel happiness you can spread it around but nobody can get you your share of happiness.

This journey started cause one of the reasons stated above or to be honest more than one. People around were turning to be boring, the music to the highest beats was making me face the music, loneliness was killing me and crowd only made lonely to deepest core in the ocean of feelings. Tired of everything I could have tried to live happily had brought me to darkest fears and lonesomeness to which I acted as a parasite. Thought if I could live it would have been only possible to do so by clinging myself to negativity filled around me and everything was dark so dark that thinking about the light could send shivers down my spine.

As the lighting struck to the earth, with its heat five times than the surface of the sun. I realized if everything is going wrong, if everything is sour, if everything is letting me down then it is not the world I should seek for answers but it is within me. So the journey began, an unforgettable, initially unrealistic and sense of reverie struck to my soul. I suddenly was two, the me and myself, as I looked upon me from myself I could feel and see, that the me is hurt, is seeking from others and from all the wrong others, the ones did not really care about me or that is what me thought, then there was a change instead of me seeking company of others to feel happy I longed the company of myself, realizing I had to try to make the world happy without feeling myself.

The conversation began, the debate started the long forgotten small, gentle, tender voice in myself started to speak to me. The deepest secrets, saturnine feelings, happiest movements, my need for me I spoke it all to myself. Without the fear of getting ditched, lacking trust and the feeling to hide. Myself heard me completely, encouraged me to speak more and more until I had to nothing to bark about. There was comfort, a relaxation, a sheer pleasure running through me, filled with energy. I could feel utmost peace then myself spoke, is this all that you have or something more than this? the me had nothing else but insights and realizations that spoke to me unspoken. An incidence came up to me “I only cursed my broken hand until I saw a man with none”.

Me realized what had I ignored? Myself. Burdened with past worried for the future never living in the present, the past had gone and nothing can undo it, the future is unknown and would only be known when I live it today, everything started taking shape. Me need to love myself before I can love the world around, the agnize me could be only feel blessed, peace and happy. If you are not comfortable with your own self, don’t console the world, if you cannot trust yourself don’t seek in others, if you don’t love yourself don’t expect it from others.

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